The practice of conscious "control": expanding perception in one day

"I'm used to controlling everything." "I control the people I loved." "I control my subordinates." I'm controlling... The word "control" is pronounced with such pathos, as if the "important bosses" really achieved something. What? That's right — the habit of being afraid... Life. The future. Improvisations.

Behind all the arguments about control there is a huge fear of losing your sweet illusion of significance.

How does this stupid control come about?

At first you are small and helpless. Your existence depends on your parents, teachers, and elders. And unfortunately, in most cases, these "grown-ups" and sad citizens overwhelm you. Everything in you is feelings, emotions, energy.

You quickly learn to be "good" because it promises benefits. You quickly learn to be cunning, because you figure out their weaknesses and know when to cry and be offended, and when to shut up and say "love". You quickly learn to manipulate your small world, in which everything is set up to deprive you of your own will.

You fight as best you can — with parents, classmates, teachers. You are rebelling and trying to escape from the public opinion of a "promising" child. But you are brought back to someone else's "reality" over and over again: "you have to study well," "you have to win competitions," "you have to obey your parents."

But no one teaches you to be happy. No gifts. Without coercion. Without conditions. Unfortunately, the vast majority of people carry this model of relationship into later life. Perhaps it is you who have already learned not to love, but to win attention and encouragement. It is you who are used to the imposed fear of "I have to match a successful image."

The existence of "without freedom" gets boring already in childhood. And it is not a childish desire that is being formed at all: "When I grow up, then everyone will listen to me. I'll be in charge." This wish sounds like a sentence to your fate, because it carries a huge amount of suffering, but — as always — it is fulfilled. And you stop doing the most amazing thing — going through life easily.

How can you be easy when you constantly need to control everything? The world is in danger. Humanity is degrading. There are only dummies and sluts around. Ay, and all this bunch of morons attacks you both at work and at home. Ah, and only you, as a stronghold of civilization, stand proudly on top of the world and reproachfully ask God: "Well, my heavenly Father, how did you bring this to this? You're not working on it, Dad." And you go on being indignant. And every day you find another excuse for discontent. And new reasons for frustration are bombarded every day.

Remember, your strongest desire—even if not consciously— for many years has been the desire to control others. But not myself. That's what you've been taught. It has become a habit that has led to a lot of stereotypes that have become limitations.

Even if it's not your fault. You have been made so cold, so measured, so detached, so correct, that as soon as someone dares to doubt your opinion, everything explodes inside you. You are indignant. Get angry. "Righteous speeches" are pouring out of you in an endless stream of denunciations.

Some of you call it emotionality. Someone with openness. Of course, now that you're an adult and nervous, psychologists say you don't need to suppress your emotions. But — your emotions are just a set of "images" from the past. You have been taught to react this way by deeply unhappy people, who, again, are used to controlling everything. And first of all, you. It's so nice to be "in charge" when the child has no way out. But if you realize that control is a habit that comes from an inner fear of not conforming to generally accepted norms, then you will change that. If you want to. If you don't want to, don't worry. Fate will do this for you, but by tougher methods, in which there are no concepts of "humanity".

Try to understand now that the emotions that break free when the world "offends" you are not an abstraction, but an energy that has long been suppressed and conserved in you. A huge reserve of energy with which you can do absolutely anything.

And you don't need to go on a pilgrimage for this energy. This is your power, which no one will ever be able to take away. But you will have to let go of control... At least logically assessing that you have no control over anything. Absolutely. Nothing. Neither yourself, nor your loved ones, not the world around you.

Do you think I'm going to tell you now how to cancel the control? Ha! Not now. Because at the moment, the best practice that will help controlling people become great magicians of their lives is precisely conscious control. And this is a real challenge for everyone. I guarantee it. Do it. And prepare for the pain.

Although, when I describe it now, it seems that it is easy. Oh, what an illusion this is... My favorite illusion... The simplest and most effective practices are always very "fun" to do.

The first stage of entertainment. Once a day for one hour, don't think about relationships with people. In general, do not think about any relationship. As soon as thoughts come, cut them off. Rebuild. Think about anything. Immerse yourself in your work. Practice. Persistently learn something. Hold out for an hour. Just one hour of your life... Then increase the "game" with perception to two or three hours a day. It is possible at different times of the day.

The second stage of entertainment. The most "difficult" thing is not to think about any relationship — future, past, present — during the day. One day. Just one day of your life... Weak? I'm sure it is! You will not master this practice the first time. But what a challenge for you, your ego, your habits. You — seemingly — control everything around you...

I promise it will be unforgettable. At the beginning of the day, everything is going "well." You've already practiced. You take care of yourself. It even becomes easy for you not to think about some people there. And you are already proud of yourself and even relax: "Oh, nonsense, all that Inna wrote there... I feel so good. I control my thoughts and emotions! I'm great!" But on this wonderful day of "getting a master degree of awareness," something unplanned is bound to happen, something that did not foretell at all...

You will hear either "random" words that will strongly hook you, or some actions will be performed about you, or... or... Or... But something real will throw you out of the "I control myself" state. And the most interesting thing is that thanks to this event, you will clearly see where the illusions about yourself, partner, relatives, friends, etc. lurk in you. What you thought was "worked out" and "understood" will appear in all its glory, like a verification file. And under no circumstances should you sort things out at this "fateful" moment. Not today. They said about themselves to the conditional "abuser": "You're right, of course, but go to...", and they went to deal with their own stupidity.

Extremely effective. Extremely effective. And, of course, it's painful. But this pain will be like a scalpel. A thin surgical instrument will perform an operation on your mind. Yes... You'll get upset, maybe even cry and get angry.

It's real now — don't hold back your emotions. Do not avoid sadness, but immerse yourself in it and analyze it. You will be surprised: "Here I am a fool/ fool! I saw it(a) this has happened before. Why did I persist in acting(a) with this person (people) like an idiot."

Believe me, recognizing your own idiocy is the best practice of mindfulness in all worlds and in all Universes!

Smile. You performed this operation yourself. And tomorrow? You will repeat the experiment tomorrow. Or in a month. Whenever you want. The most effective method for advanced users is to practice for 7 days. Super fun — for 21 days. Then such miracles will be showered on you!

If you have a "stable family life," then I suggest that you do not think about money, about work, in general, about what causes an endless monologue inside you.

During this period, it is welcome to get upset about external outrages — both in the world and in people. It's not scary. The main thing is to consciously monitor what caused the "anger". It's good to write it down. But not like this: "Gosha said I was a fool! He's a complete moron himself!" It won't work...

Gosha said I was a fool. What did I feel? I felt offended because he was my friend, and I hoped that he would praise me, because I opened up to him, and he "trampled on my sincerity.".. Also, it's not a topic.

I was offended/offended — it doesn't work. Write honestly. For yourself, and not for a fiery speech at a psychoanalyst's appointment, where you also try to "justify" your own actions with beautiful, but false words. If you want, write obscenities. Perfectly! And most importantly, remember that in this practice you have only two emotions — love and hate. I want to add that these feelings in our game are "conditional", but will have a great therapeutic effect on the mind.

So, I hate this bastard for the fact that I hoped/hoped for him, and he... He didn't come. He didn't get married. I didn't listen. It didn't help. etc. What he did is not important at all! It's important that you hoped.

You you have linked your future with the actions of another person, i.e. you have created the illusion that someone else is responsible for your inner state. And your condition changed as soon as it didn't happen. And who is a fool or a fool in this situation? Well, of course, you are. Hurray! An understanding has been reached.

And after two weeks, your "anger", which was a few days earlier, will already seem ridiculous.

Keep in mind that the apparent "simplicity" of our joyful practices and specifically this practice directly tells the System of God: "I am ready for the exam. Check me out." And quantum physics is aka "God the Father" — acts immediately, based on the movement of your neurons, electromagnetic fields and clearly formulated intention.

Do practice and have fun, because there is no more exciting activity in this world than getting to know yourself. And to come to yourself, you don't need far paths. No secret knowledge is required. No need for fancy words. It is necessary to "just" get rid of illusions about yourself, and then you will see what a huge power, power and love are hidden in you.