To imagine that now I'm going to die, and there's such a blissful soft darkness will cover me, it's all mind games and human ignorance of what happens after death.
Yes, many naturally deceased people have sleep states after death before their next birth, but not suicides.
Suicides open their eyes and see a world that is similar in all respects, but they are no longer able to change the situation there. And their emotions of indignation and pain from the injustice of being increase hundreds/thousands of times.
If you don't want to live normally, learn to appreciate life, but with limited physical abilities.
Your "incredible" suffering is provoked by an increased level of cortisol. And during the flight period, adrenaline will be released, which will burn cortisol. And you are healthy. Just have time to think: "What am I doing?".
If you choose another way of suicide, hanging, cutting veins, then also the realization of your stupidity will have time to come before death. As soon as the body begins to die, all functions will be aggravated. And you will die a psychologically healthy person. Even when killing yourself with a firearm, seconds stretch into eternity and you have time to think that you are a moron.
Death is the very enlightenment that is provided for everyone. This state of transformation of perception is naturally inherent in a person. And for the sake of the 21 seconds that occur after the death of the physical body, we train mindfulness, i.e. concentration and division of attention between the body and consciousness.
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